My own “Ah boy” to man
One of the joys of being a parent to boys, is having the chance to witness the little ways in which a boy turns into a man. I had one such experience last week when we went to the JE Swimming Complex.
Elias has great situational awareness and is an excellent problem-solver.
At the JE swimming pool, he is the one I rely on, to help me get in and out of the Lazy River.
Something happened in the Lazy River which resulted in Elias losing his swimming float to a stranger-boy. While Elias was trying to get it back from the boy, the boy punched him on the face.
Elias was very upset and came out of the pool. The reason he was upset was not so much because he got punched, but because of a matter which involved Elkan, and which I may share another time. Anyway, that part was settled and Elias became emotionally more settled.
Suddenly he got up and announced “I am going to look for the boy”.
Upon seeing the horror on my face, he said “I am not going to take revenge, I want to report him to the lifeguard”.
I did not know what to make of it. But since I still had some loose ends to tie with Elkan, and Elias was so purposeful, I passively let him go. (Hoping that Daddy won’t scold me for not stopping him… Hey, I am the mother, I am the nurturer, I know little about fighting physical enemies…)
After I was finally done with Elkan, I went to look for Elias. I found him, at the edge of the Lazy River, looking at a boy. He saw me (he is rather amazing, he has the ability to sense my presence, although I was quite far away and just overlooking the River) and gestured to me, that that was the boy.
Then he turned his attention back to the boy. He did not say much to him, but his steely gaze communicated authority, and the boy simply followed after him. They walked out of the pool, and Elias led the boy to Daddy.
I wish I had a camera to take a video close-up of how Elias acted that moment, but his expression will remain in my mind for a long time.
Elias touches my heart because he is such an affectionate and fun-loving boy. Even at this age, he is still very effusive in the physical demonstration of his affection. He is still very cheeky and playful. To me, he is still a dear, little boy.
Elias is child-enough to still want to go to the Zoo (Elkan is no longer interested).
He is still child-enough to make cute, and cheeky poses for the camera.
So seeing him that day, so confident and full of authority, was such an awe-inspiring experience. It is like that time, when he and his brother ran to the edge of the waterfalls.
Elias I am so proud of you.
You did not hit the boy – that’s exercising self-control.
You took time to cool down and reflect – that’s applying wisdom.
You went to get the boy – that’s recognising your dominion.
You got him to follow you – that’s demonstrating authority.
You brought him to a higher authority – that’s executing justice.
From “Ah boy” to a man indeed.
